Phone Etiquette: Manners

While I was writing the previous Phone Etiquette post, I found that I was writing a lot more about the goals than I originally planned. So I figured why not split the other things I wanted to talk about into another post.


The biggest thing in my mind about phone conversations is what kind of impression you're making on the person you're talking to. If you already know the person, you can talk casually, and not worry about it, since they know what you're like. However, if you're still trying to get a feel for each other, you want to be sure you're giving the right impression of yourself.

In my personal opinion, the best first impression to give is a combination of being classy, intelligent, polite, professional and friendly. Classy is first in my mind because you can never go wrong displaying class. Showing that you're intelligent is always good because you probably wouldn't want to spend time with a guy who's looking for a stupid girl. Being polite is always a good choice because no one likes dealing with a rude person. Showing that you're professional shows that you're together and serious about actually getting together. Lastly friendly is good because you want to display warmth and understanding.

Setting the stage
If you're expecting a call, it's always good to set the stage. In this case, that would mean first making sure you have a good signal, if you're using a cell phone. The other thing would be to be sure you have privacy. Nothing more off-putting to hear voices in the background, especially if it's another guy! The next would be to remove any distractions. No TV in the background, nothing in the oven waiting to be burned, no alarms waiting to go off, etc. If possible, I'd also try and clear your schedule around the time of your call. You can usually kind of sense if someone's in a rush to get off the phone with you, and that obviously doesn't leave a good impression. Personally, since I have a bad memory, I like to have a pen & paper or a laptop nearby so I can take notes during the call. Lastly, for the love of god, don't eat or chew on anything while you're on the phone. That's just horrible!

Greeting
The very first impression is how you answer the phone. If someone's calling you, I prefer the tried and tested: "Hello?". It's really kind of awkward to call someone, and hear "What?", "Yeah?" "Huh?" or "What do you want?".

During the conversation
Obviously not every phone conversation is the same, so here's some tips:

1. Express yourself clearly - Try your best to speak clearly and enuciate your words. If you've ever talked with someone who has a heavy accent, and find yourself annoyed that you have to keep on asking them to repeat what they said, then you get the idea why this is important.
2. Express yourself concisely - Keep things simple and to the point. You can talk in length either in person, or after you've actually met. Hearing about your neighbor's friend's cousin's uncle's cat and how that relates to what he said probably isn't necessary.
3. Actively listen - This is why I like having a pen & paper. I can keep notes, and be sure I'm actually registering what the person is saying to me, rather than having it go in one ear and out the other.
4. Don't interrupt - Pretty obvious, no one likes to get cut off. Try not to interrupt what they're saying if you can avoid it.

Your Voicemail
Personally, I leave my voicemail with the default message. However if you're using your phone for business or sugar, I'd suggest otherwise. I'd start the message with listing your phone number. Follow that up letting the caller know you're unavailable, and to leave a message. Lastly, since many times discretion may be very important, you can ask that they leave their number and what time is best to reach them, IF it's ok to call back, or otherwise they can call again. Here's an example:

"Hello, you've reached 555-1234. I'm not available right now, but please leave a message with your name, and message. If you want me to return your call, please leave your number, and what times are best to reach you. Otherwise, I hope that you'll call again when I am able to answer your call."

Returning a call
If someone left you a voicemail and told you it was ok to call back, then do so. I'd suggest that you have some work done upfront just to be safe. First I'd write the name and number that they left you. Then I'd write a similar phone number just in case. This way if a female or someone unexpected answers the phone, you can pass your call off as a wrong number.

While I was doing some research, I found the following resource. It's a guide for a student call center, but the advice is pretty applicable to any phone etiquette.
http://www.fullerton.edu/it/services/telecom/faq/etiquetteguide.asp

Some of the interesting subjects that it covered were:

• Handling Rude or Impatient Callers
• How to End Conversations Gracefully
• 16 Words and Phrases That Keep Students Cool

At the end of the day, a first phone should be looked at as an introduction or first impression. Take efforts to put your best foot forward, while also being yourself. If the caller is disrespectful, rude or unwilling to comply with your requests then obviously he isn't worth your time or effort.